And Yet I Will Praise Him!

It's 7 am - and I am waking up after a short night sleep. I did not sleep much at all - as worries kept going through my mind, all the time. These thoughts just could not leave me alone and kept occupying my mind - even when I continually reminded myself that would be fine after all. You know, me and my wife we have been struggling a lot over the recent years. We got ourselves into debt by making the wrong decisions all the time - and when we did have some money to spend, we wasted it on things we did not needed. It's the story of my life, really - as I never have been able to hold on to money or to manage it well.

There were times when I wished I had all the things my friend had. After all, they drove nice cars and lived in beautiful homes - and their lives seemed so picture - perfect! Nothing like us - as we always rented and the car I drive I don't even want to talk about. And what about my right to have good things - after all, we live in a materialistic society where there is enough for everyone, right? Often I made this excuse and bought things  I could not afford which increased our mountain of debt. Although we bought that car on finance - we could hardly keep up with the monthly payments and we missed a few, affecting my credit rating....

I am tired - and even before I stepped out of bed, the day had begun with worries and negativity. Something has to happen - this cannot go on any longer. And I know that my faith has not been so great either lately - as I let negative thoughts overpower my heart and mind - not leaving any room for God to move. That's wrong - and I suddenly realize this is the key to the change I so desperately need. I definately need to talk to someone in church and even more importantly, talk to God.

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It's a week later. My eyes are still closed, but I am awake. Five days ago, I promised God that I would give Him praise the first thing when I wake up - so I do. "Father, Thank You for this new day - and for giving me breath in my lungs to praise you. Help me today to give you the praise You deserve and to live this day for Your glory!"  I open my eyes - and look besides me. My wife is still asleep - I realize how beautiful she is and thank God for her, praying for her to be hugely blessed today. I quitely get dressed and go downstairs for breakfast. It's a  brand new day!

A lot has happened over the last few days - after I decided to make a start to see my life turned around for good. I had a really good conversation with Chris, one of our church leaders. I explained to him where I was struggling and told him about my worries. He listened, without interrupting me once. After I told him everything that was on my heart, Chris said that it would be good to pray and for me to talk with God, confessing my sins of worrying and bad stewardship, asking for His help. I prayed and told God everything, telling Him how sorry I was that I have not put Him first and did not handle everything as I should have. I asked His forgiveness and help to understand more of what it means to be a good steward. As soon as my prayer finished, I felt such a relief and peace in my heart! For the first time, the day seemed sunny and not gloomy - and I could hear the birds sing when I walked back home through the park. How come I never noticed this before?

Very soon, things started to change. I started to make some great decisions - instead of sitting down in my misery. Chris is great - he keeps checking with me how I am doing and I promised to hold myself accountable to him, some sort of buddy system. It works! He helped me to make a list of all my incomings and outgoings - and we eliminated the things I could not afford and did not really need. I cancelled my Sky subscription and we also looked at luxury spending which was causing me to go in to my overdraft. We set up a budget for shopping and created an emergency fund for unexpected bills. I negotiated a cheaper rent with my landlord, which he accepted! We also set up a payment plan for my loans and credit cards - and set up automatic payments to pay off the most expensive debts first.

I committed my entire life back to God - including my finance and all my needs. I knew I had to start tithing - and I decided to put my faith into God rather than into my bank account. I set up a standing order for my tithe to our local church - to honor God with my 'first fruits' as the Bible teaches. God impressed on my heart to honor Him with everything I have - and expect Him to supply my every need.

The most important decision I made though - is to decide to continually praise Him, no matter the circumstance. Although I still might get depressed sometimes - and have obstacles to deal with - He is always worthy to receive my praise. I am created to give Him praise as He is my creator and I am His masterpiece. I realized that God is always worthy to be praised, even if I don't feel like it. Praise lifts the spiritual heaviness that wants to depress me. Praise lifts me up above my circumstances, giving me a heavenly view of my life. Praise is the key to tapping into the Father's heart and receiving His peace and wisdom to deal with life's unexpected turns. Praise is breaking chains and setting captives free!

Now I'm jumping for joy,
and shouting and singing my thanks to him.

Psalm 28:6-7